10 Flatmate commandments for happily ever after

The thing about moving out of your parents home after university and into a big city like London is that you will undoubtedly return to living in a house or flat share. While you thought that long gone are the days of sharing a kitchen and bathroom with people you don't know, a move to London will quickly prove you wrong about this. After a few housing 'mares from my own move down here last September, I thought it would be good to send out a gentle reminder about the etiquette of being a good flatmate. Here are my top flatmate commandments.

Thou shalt clean up after thyself and generally take care of the place
I think this is standard flatmate 101, right? Right?? No? Some people will need to be told this? I see...

Thou shalt not let dirty dishes pile up 
House shares at uni and house shares as a grown, full-time working adult are two completely different things. Back then it wasn't unusual to be met with week old dirty dishes and mess on the kitchen counter every time you ventured into the kitchen. But back then it was 'kinda annoying but whatever, I'll just ask them to clean up' whereas now it's 'Omg is this sh*t still happening, why??' I'll admit that this is, personally, now my biggest pet peeve, and never have I loved a cleaning rota so much as I have now (I know, I can hear my mum manically laughing all the way back in Nottingham).

Thou shalt not be controlling / weird / a dick 
Sending text messages to turn off the lights because it's nearly midnight? Seeing that your clothes in the drier are done while you're not home so deciding to help you out by laying out just your underwear on the kitchen table like some strange exhibition? Deciding to bring the party back home at 3am complete with copious amounts of alcohol and possible drugs? No. Just no. (thankfully, only the first scenario has happened to me while the last two are horror stories from friends).

Thou shalt not be opposed to getting a takeout and watching Made in Chelsea and/or First Dates on a Monday evening because Monday's suck.
Monday's are not fun, I think we can all agree on that. So let's join in on chilling out in front of the TV and trying out the new Thai place that just opened down the road. The only thing we'll have to decide on is whose turn it is to collect the order and pick up some snacks on the way...

Thou shalt respect each others property and privacy 
This includes milk, bread, eggs and general food unless otherwise stated. Prices are high and wages are low, but let's not result to petty left please.

Thou shalt be supportive and listen to thy housemate rant about work deadlines, colleagues and/or general life issues 
You don't even have to really listen. Just let out a 'really', 'seriously?' and maybe even an 'omg no way?!' every now and then and that's good enough for me. In all seriousness though, sometimes it's nice to talk about work or life to someone who isn't heavily involved or influenced in any way. It can help with getting a second opinion or just reassuring you that you are indeed, not crazy.

Thou shalt come back after a date and tell all - the good, the bad, and the oh so ugly.
Did he stare at your boobs the entire time? Was he a bit of an arrogant slime-ball? Or was he completely charming, able to hold interesting conversation and totally on your same wavelength? We want all the details.

Thou shalt not be a ghost but also thou shalt not be a shadow
It's all about having a good balance, you know? There's no requirement to be the best of friends, but the occasional meal together, movie marathon or night out won't hurt. However, sometimes you just gotta stay in your room and cry over the season finale of your favourite TV show, I totally understand.

Thou shalt take responsibility for thyself
I will definitely be the first to admit that being an adult is hard. Or harder than we first thought it would be back when we were sitting for our GCSE Math exams. But 'forgetting' to pay rent, turning the trash can into a real life game of Tetris or generally not taking on any contributions to the household is not the best way to start. It's ok though, we can get through this together.

Thou shalt be supportive of thy roommates promise to themselves to join the gym, a yoga class or a running club.
Even if you've made that same promise 32 times now. You know what they say - 33rd time's a charm.

One major thing that I've realised is that sometimes, being a great person/friend and being a great flatmate can be two very different things. It's not always the case that just because you get on with someone, you can necessarily have a stress free flat share situation. Or vice versa - maybe you and your flatmate are not the best of friends, but there still lies at least mutual respect and understanding on both sides - and what more could you ask for really?

What other housemate commandments would you add to the list?

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Four days in Lisbon

A couple of months ago I hopped on a plane to spend four days in the city of Lisbon for a friends birthday. After almost being stranded, we finally got the keys to the apartment we had rented, unpacked and prepped to explore the beautiful city. One thing I feel everyone planning to visit Lisbon should know is that navigating your way around it's cobbled streets and steep hills can be tiring, so stock up on water when leaving your apartment/hotel and take appropriate shoes (there was not a heel or wedged shoe in sight ladies!)

On our first day we explored the old town, finding cute little shops with handmade clothes and jewelry and stumbling upon back streets that led to picturesque views. One of my favourite places we discovered that day was in Alfama as we were walking up to Castelo de Sao Jorge. The view from up there was pretty incredible as you could see over rooftops, peering into gardens and getting a real feel for the very relaxed nature of the city. One thing I would definitely recommend also is taking a visit to Pasteis de Belem and choosing from the many options of cakes, pastries and of course, the famous Pastel de Nata (so good that my friend bought six for the flight back to England!)

After struggling with being in London and trying to keep up with the rat race, it was so refreshing to visit a capital city where you could bask in the sunlight, relax and remember how it felt to just... chill. The laid back nature of the city coupled with the incredible views and vibrant night life (think salsa bars and dancing with policemen) makes it a great place to visit if you're in need of a long weekend getaway.

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Thoughts on turning 25 // Musings

I recently turned 25 and the thought of being mid-twenties excites and scares me at the same time.

All us twenty something year olds have come a long way from 16 and I've never felt more confident yet less confident about myself and the future than I have right now. It's a weird place to be. I feel confidence in certain things, such as my appearance, my sense of style, that I'm surrounding myself with the right people, that I can walk away from a person or situation that proves to be nothing but toxic. I feel (hope) that I've finally mastered the art of small talk and introducing myself to people at events and confident that I'm able to question things, the status quo and think for myself; among many other things. However, I still struggle with confidence in terms of my career, relationships and my own talents and abilities in general. I still second guess myself with relentless questions of what am I doing, am I doing this ok, am I right to think this or to question that at work? Am I steering my life in the right direction and will I ever be able to keep a plant alive for more than two weeks?

I've always been mindful of time and the fact that it's a rare commodity. While it's good to realise this, it often sent me in a state of panic - that I hadn't done much, or anything at all, of what I wanted to do, whatever that was. I felt that everything had to have been done yesterday and while people said 'you'll figure it out eventually' I often thought 'what if I figured it out now, wouldn't that be so much better??' I was reassured by my friends and good old buzzfeed articles that I wasn't alone in experiencing the dreaded quarter life crisis. But sometimes, strength in numbers doesn't offer much comfort - that magnifying glass on your life is a little too focused on what you should be doing that there isn't room to see what you have done.

The thing about time though, is that it will pass regardless of whether it's spent planning or panicking. Often panic can cause you to stop, not sure what direction to go in, afraid of making a decision out of fear of it being the wrong one. So for my 25th year I'll choose to plan and to actively chase life, instead of letting things just happen with no real input. I'll put myself out there more, start writing more, traveling more (or as much as my bank balance will allow), taking care of myself and those around me more and keep on learning. I'll also learn to let go more. Make no mistake though - I'm under no illusion that life will go as planned 100% of the time because, as much as I'd like to, I can't control what's going to happen. So when things don't go exactly as planned, I'll learn to roll with it, adjust my plans and see what happens.

Every decade is a struggle. I remember struggling through my school years, trying to build a sense of identity and understanding of the world around me. And then you move through it and come out the other end with a closed chapter and an eagerness to start the next. Mistakes are made time and time again but lessons are learnt to keep you pushing forward, and that's all we an hope for from every birthday we are blessed with.

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6 signs you're doing better than ok // Musings

So it's Monday morning. Again. And as you've wolfed down your breakfast in under 10 seconds flat and rushed out the door to catch the bus/tube/train the sinking 'oh no, not this again' feeling has found it's way back home to you. Some Monday's feel productive, they feel full of energy and inspiration, just waiting to be explored. While other Monday's (I'd say the majority, right?) feel like a return to the reality you tried so hard to forget about over the weekend. I'm not sure what it is about Monday's, but for me, it's a time were I have one of those 'omg-I'm-a-total-failure-at-my-own-life-and-everyone-is-doing-so-much-better-than-me-and-oh-God-why-did-I-text-him-last-night' kinda days. You know those days? Those are the days were it's absolutely paramount to remember that the negative voices in your head have absolutely no idea how incredibly awesome you are at handling life right now. How you've gotten through whatever life has thrown at you and how you will continue to do so. And if you need help remembering that, here are some simple signs that, actually, you're doing better than ok - you're doing great.    

You got the basics down
You don't even have to think about food or shelter. Maybe paying rent is a struggle and you have more month at the end of the money but it's all good - for the most part, you don't worry about the necessities, like clean water, education, leisure, healthcare and freedom of choice. As Paolo Nutini says 'I got a shelf full of books and most of my teeth, a few pairs of socks and door with a lock. I got food in my belly and a license for my telly and nothing's gonna bring me down.'

You got them clean sheets yo!
Serious question now - what is better, than doing all your laundry on a Sunday afternoon and getting in to bed on Sunday evening to freshly washed sheets? Nothing. Nothing is better than that my friend because it is pure bliss and you get the opportunity to experience this every Sunday.

You've changed, man.
You've improved a certain skill, you've learnt to let got of a certain past or you've just become more confident than you were last year. The beauty of life is that we're constantly learning, evolving and growing. It's such an achievement to say that you've tried something, regardless of whether or not it worked out, you've made a certain decision and stuck to it or learnt very important lessons.  

You have people who care about you
You have those people in your life. The people you can just chill with. You don't have to say much, just be. Those people who you know will take care of you when you're in a snowstorm of a situation - the friend who's like a mother or your actual mother who will constantly nag at you to tidy up after yourself but will cry with you while you try and mend your broken heart.
You have the people who will motivate you and banish your fears with their soothing words - the ones who believe in your ridiculous dreams even more than you do but will tell it to you straight when you ask for an honest opinion.

You can look back on a time in your life where you thought things wouldn't get better 
Remember that time you thought to yourself 'what on earth am I going to do?' 'How can I sort this out?' 'I can't do this at all'. Yet, you're still here, surviving, moving forward and learning the important lessons of life. I always like to remember when I was at uni, 2am in the morning and I'd have a mountain of work to do. I didn't think I'd get any of it done of course, every times, I'd tell myself 'I can't do this' and yet, I did do it, I did finish the assignment and I did hand it in. Simply because it had  to be done. And that's the same with life - you will get through it because, well, you have  to.

You've traveled 
You've decided to experience a culture different to your own. You've witnessed a world that operates in ways that you'd never seen before and come to realise that there is more to life than what you, yourself, experiences everyday.

What other signs show that you're doing better than ok?

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I MOVED TO LONDON

Yes. I.  Moved. To. London! Let me just repeat that one more time... I have moved, my self, to London. I now get annoyed at slow walkers and seriously worried that there's a higher risk of developing asthma because of all the pollution... But how does it feel to be in the capital?? Expensive. Bloody expensive. And tiring - My move happened so fast and it's taken me longer than expected to sort everything out. Let's start from the very beginning, I guess that's a good place to start.

So I was previously working in a call centre in customer service for the first part of 2015, hating speaking to angry customers and day dreaming about holidays to foreign lands - you know, the usual. Then I started to get quite ill and my work place wasn't the most helpful which added strain to an already stressful situation. Long story short, it got to September and I spent some time in hospital. During my stay I got a call from work confirming what I had been fearing - that they would 'ask me to leave' my job role as I'd exceeded their sick day limit. Feeling like a failure I literally had no idea what to do. The day after that happened, however, I got an email from the HR department at an organisation I'd previously applied for a job at but completely forgot amidst the stress of work. I was confused, excited and worried all at the same time. Actually, I seem to walk through life in a perpetual state of confusion, excitement and worry so nothing new I suppose! Three weeks later I'd left hospital, attended the interview, got the job (!!) and moved down to London.

I was exhausted.
But, nevertheless, it was great.
Right?

Except that finding a place to live in London is like finding a needle in a haystack. Despite there being houses everywhere, there are still more people than places. And when you do find a place, there's the risk that you could end up living with the worst person. GUESS WHAT HAPPENED TO ME?? I was lucky enough to find a place before starting work. But unlucky enough that the place I found was probably the worst place I've ever lived. The actual flat was lovely, but the lady I was living with just was not. She lied/twisted the truth about a few (important) things and made me feel totally unwelcome. After one too many panic attacks, I knew that I had to leave. So I did after just one month. I left but didn't actually have any where planned to go - talk about a stupid decision but it seemed to work out for the better. I stayed with my cousin/family friend, the commute to work was about 2 hours and cost me a fortune but I felt instantly happier and safer. So I continued my hunt for a place to live through Sparerooms, going to 2 or 3 house viewings everyday after work and trying to convince complete strangers that I should live with them. I'm not sure what's worse - house viewings or job interviews?? Three months and an empty bank account later, I found a place and so far no crazy flat mates. Thank. The. Lord.

Things could have been better, but they could have also been much worse so I hold on to that to make me feel better about the past couple of months. Besides, 2016 is here, I'm in a job that I'm actually enjoying and learning from everyday, my health seems to be somewhat under control and I'm living in and exploring London as much as I can, that is, until the ridiculous prices forces me back to Nottingham.

When have you made a big move?

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American Eagle comes to the UK!

American Eagle - Denim X

I love shopping. Shopping with friends, with family, with my sister, online or by myself - I mean who doesn't love it?  But when it comes to shopping for some new jeans I'd rather just re-take my final year exams ten times over. Ok, so that's definitely an exaggeration, but when I have to buy new jeans I just cry a little inside at the thought of countless hours strolling through shops to find jeans that fit right, you know? Not tight on the legs then big on the waist, or too short or too long or just not right. And being 5ft8, it's a bit of a struggle. So when I found out that American Eagle Outfitters had opened some stores in the UK (Westfield White City; London, Westfield Stratford and Bluewater Kent) I was pretty excited.

They're are known over in America for their great quality denim and jeans which, when you're as fussy as me, is vital.  Their recent collections Denim X and Shine Thru The Night both look perfect for winter, whether it's for keeping warm or dazzling at your work Christmas Party. I always love buying new jeans, jackets and jumpers for winter so their recent collection is pretty perfect if you're looking at updating your winter wardrobe.

For their store opening they've even teamed up with the babe that is Daisy Lowe, who looks pretty  in their ad:


So if you're near Westfield White City Westfield Stratford in London or BlueWater in Kent, why not check out the new American Eagle store nearby!

*This post has been sponsored by American Eagle, 

but all thoughts are my own

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I know this great little place... // Lincolnshire

A couple of weeks ago my friend and I decided to head a little further up North to Lincolnshire for a day visit. It was pretty spontaneous actually as she called me up the night before and since I've officially finished uni now (ohhhhh yeeeaaaah) I have quite a bit of spare time at the moment. So I decided to put the job applications to one side for the day and went along with her.

Lincoln is just under two hours away by train and the best way to describe it is a sort of hybrid between a town and village.  It's so pretty and I can imagine it being even more stunning during the summer months. We wanted to head to the Cathedral which is about a 10 minute walk from the main city centre and it's situated on top of what is quite possible the biggest hill I've ever had to climb. Ever. One of the streets leading up to the Cathedral is actually called Steep Hill and, let me tell you, it lives up to it's name. At one point me and my friend were half way up and there was a woman walking up behind us who was pretty much wheezing as she was walking up and it just made me feel 1000x more sorry for people who lived at the top and had to do the walk everyday!

This was about halfway up the hill and already the view was pretty incredible.

The Cathedral was HUGE.  The design and architecture of the building was so great you have to just take a couple of minutes to take it all in. 

We also decided to visit Lincoln Castle and climbed up one of its towers to see such an amazing view. I must have taken so many pictures up there but this was one of my favourites, It's of the Cathedral from afar and just shows you how big the building is and also how high up we were.  My camera doesn't really do it justice but if you're ever in Lincoln make sure to also visit the castle and go up one of the towers - it's the best.

I made my friend take a quick ootd photo for me!
Top; H&M // Denim Shirt; New Look // Jeans; New Look

I've never been to Lincoln before and walking around reminded me of when I used to live down in Devon. We lived in a sort of town/village about half an hour away from Exeter that was filled with one off shops and tea rooms that felt quintessentially British.  Living in a main city it's quite nice to take a trip to somewhere a bit quieter.

Where is one of your favourite quick getaway places near where you live?

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Urban Outfitters comes to Leicester!

In November last year I wrote about Urban Outfitters coming to Nottingham and now they have a brand new store opening in Leicester (about 30 mins away from Notts) and it is just all kinds of exciting!! I've come to the conclusion Urban Outfitters are like buses. You know, you wait ages for one and then two come along at once? (yep, great analogy there..). Anyway, I was lucky enough to be invited to the store opening in Leicester last week to have a look round the new store





I'm always amazed at how cool the mannequins are dressed in Urban Outfitters stores, definitely a place for fashion inspiration in terms of layering and mixing prints!



One of my favourite parts of the store was the little homeware section upstairs by the fitting rooms. I'm a bit of a sucker for homeware and random books and quirky ornaments so was eyeing up the Wes Anderson collection book and the fairy lights too so I think I shall purchase them on the next payday!






The store was so lovely and had a great old school feel to it - I think there will be many people spending many hours browsing through the shop floor.  It's located in such an easy to get to place too in the Highcross Shopping Centre so if you live in Leicester or are planning a trip there soon, be sure to pay it a visit! As well as being invited to the opening I was also lucky enough to pick out an item of clothing so I shall have an ootd post for that at some point next week!

Currently, I am loving:

James Bay - Let it Go

Check out my latest YouTube video: The Compliment Challenge 

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Manchester times!

Last week I handed in my Coursework and broke up from uni for Christmas break so I planned to spend the weekend in Manchester visiting my friend Bim who had just moved there for work. I've been to Manchester before but only briefly so it was nice to spend a whole weekend there and take a stroll through the Christmas markets and Art Gallery.  It was also my Birthday last week so it was nice to get away after all the uni stress!

I also met up with fellow blogger Halima over at Fashionicide for dinner while I was there which was nice as it's always lovely to meet bloggers in person! We decided on a Wagamama's and had a lovely evening discussing blogging, parents and er, politics haha!

The next day I dragged Bim over to the Manchester Art Gallery in town. We went on a Sunday near closing time so it was nice and quite and we just had a look round. I love going to Art Galleries whenever I'm in a City that I don't know that well. I don't know a thing about art though - I just like having a look round; I feel like I'm walking through someone's home and having a nosey at their pictures ha!

This was my favourite painting, I wish I could remember what it was called but it shows Egyptian women collecting water from the Nile.

Hope you're all having a lovely Christmas break and enjoying the festivities/holidays/time of work

Check out my latest YouTube video on making decisions HERE 

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